Oh yes he diiiiiiiid

So I have no idea who Andrew WK is or what music he makes, but he sounds like a keeper.

Advice Seeker: I’m dating a guy who refuses to give up on his dreams of rock stardom. While it’s admirable in a way, I need a little bit more stability if we’re going to make this work. How can I gently break this to him?

Andrew WK: Don’t you dare say anything to him about giving up his dream. You’re not the right person for him. Never ask someone to give up on their dream just so you can feel more stable. It’s his choice and his choice alone, no matter how ridiculous his dream may seem to you, or to society, or even to himself. Dreams make humans into self-realized individuals. Your only responsibility is to love everything about him, including his dreams. The idea of “making this work” sounds more like a way to make his life more boring and predictable. At worst, it’s a genuine sadistic desire to control someone else because your own life feels out of control — or a cruel need to dominate and break someone’s spirit for the sake of your own peace of mind. Look for stability and peace of mind inside yourself, and not in your relationships or the dreams of others

www.thefrisky.com

Under The Influence

A while ago I had dinner with an Aunt & Uncle of mine and my Uncle said something to me that has been hitting me hard lately and making me reflect upon myself and the life I'm living.  He told me that I have a very special gift... the gift of Influence. He said that he sees me as a very influential person because my personality draws people to me. He also pointed out that I have a choice to make, the choice of what kind of influence I am going to be.

The reason this has been hitting me so hard lately is because I've realized who I have this influence over, my Family. And yeah, I guess I do have an influence over the family that is my age or older, but I feel like my target audience is my younger family, especially one younger lad in particular... my 13 year old brother Noah. Noah is the little brat that stole my sunshine and took my throne as the baby of the family, but we have a 12 year age difference which makes his childhood way different than the rest of mine & my siblings. He's now at the age where he takes everything in around him and is going to pretty much shape his attitude and outlook on life. Before my Dad passed away, he gathered my siblings and myself and told us we all had one common responsibility now: Noah. That no matter what we were all responsible for his well being. And now that Noah isn't such a baby anymore, I feel that I need to start getting my shit together so I can be a good example for him since we are the closest in age and he looks up to me.

This new year of 2012 I am challenging myself with many goals that I intend to accomplish. Goals that I've thought about but never even tried to accomplish, goals that I've slightly tried to achieve, and new goals that I've never had the guts to push myself to mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. My life is going to take a big turn soon. All I can pray for is that I have enough strength to keep pushing and that I continue to have my friends & family support me and keep me focused. The motivation to better myself and my family, that pushes all of my individual goals for this new year is very clear to me now:

Lead By Example

Be the change you want to see in the world - Mahatma Ghandi

I hope you all have at least one fabulous resolution for the new year too & make it your bitch! 
Cheers to 2012 friends :)

We're in our TWENTIES!

Recently my best friend's favorite saying is "but we're in our twenties", like if we're supposed to have it all figured out by the time we're 25 and not be making stupid decisions, especially about men. I told her we should probably cherish it while we can before we hit our 30's and her response was : "WHAT, you're crazy. We're gonna be freaking fabulous in our 30's, hubby's and kids and we're still gonna look fly".... So that means now is the time to make all of our mistakes and be stupid cause we're going to be boring and miserable with offspring clinging to our legs at every.second.of.every.day.
Well at least that's what she thinks, I'm not making myself any promises for my 30's with the whole Hubby & Kids package.

Away from Fantasy Island and in my opinion, my twenties seem to be nothing but a "Trial and Error" life stage. We're legal adults with child thoughts and actions. And we're learning that our actions and decisions have life lasting consequences and only we are responsible for them. We're learning that being that independent adult we've always wanted to be, isn't 100% awesome as we thought. Sure we can stay up as late as we want and drink as much alcohol as we want, but we have to get up for WORK the next morning because we are now paying for our own shit like cars and homes if we'd prefer not to be homeless. The paycheck you get from your awesome job is only glorified for a few days, till more than half of it goes to bills. Then you gotta learn how to stretch out the little of that check that is left, for two WHOLE weeks and manage to go out and do something fun but not too pricey. Oh yeah, that credit card you got approved for when you were big & bad and 18, should probably be paid on time and more than the minimum payment if you ever want credit to get a place of your own or a nicer car than the hooptie your parents bought you when you were 16 that is now 12 years old.

Recently, another friend and I were chatting about how being responsible sucks and makes us poor, so I told her "We're gonna look back at us one day and laugh at how poor we were... Hopefully that day is Friday aka PAYDAY!" Which seems like it's every other week I feel that way. I've learned moving in with friends isn't always the best idea like everyone says... especially when your roommate doesn't pay their rent which then results to shit credit. I'm learning that sometimes super cute shoes are more important than a week's worth of lunch food, especially when you're trying to diet (do the math people). I've learned that we cannot eat all the junk food we once did, now we have to count every single calorie. I've learned that guys can gossip just as much as girls and it takes most of them longer to mature than women. I've learned that there's just some guys that you should stay far away from, but you won't because Danger is your middle name. And I've learned that being in our twenties, we're old enough to know better, yet we're young enough not to care.

Hey, we're in our twenties, it's all good! At least we'll have memories to entertain our thirty year old brains with.

Good judgment comes from experience. 

Experience comes from bad judgment.

- Jim Horning

Words of Wisdom

There is not TIME in your DAY to remind someone of how wonderful you are. And not in the Tyra Banks Disney Channel movie self-empowerment way, either. In the factual way. In the way that if someone does not speak French, and you are walking around speaking French all day long, it’s just not a fair exchange. You do not have TIME on this EARTH to tread water and slow down to educate some idiot re: why you’re an asset and a treasure and an honor to be around. If he can’t figure it out, he’s a moron. 
Done. 
Next.  
It’s actually that easy. And I know it doesn’t always feel like it, but goddammit you need to fall in love with someone who looks at you and is like, “Holy crap, here is the human! Here is the human that is different from all of the other humans!” and if you’re fucking around with anything less than that, then you’re wasting your own time more than anything else, and as your friend I’m just not going to stand for it. This guy does not love you. You don’t even love him, you just want him to like you because WHY DOESN'T HE?
But at the end of the day, fuck it, my angel.  
Fuck it, and fuck him, you do not have TIME in your DAY to solve extra credit math problems.  
You are too busy being wonderful.

Via

Broke Girls Guide

Last week was National Singles Week and to honor this, my best single cousin, my friend who should be single and myself went out Friday night and let the West side of Phoenix know we love being single! None of us had money to spend on getting ourselves drunk, so we decided we'd make it a point to have all the guys buy our drinks as an exchange for our company... for 2 minutes of course. The night was a complete success and we got our free drinks all night and left the club with Australian accents. I forgot how fun it is to go out and just to be slightly obnoxious.
After recovering the next day, I realized you've got to have a plan to have a good night like these 'cause we all know every single night you go out doesn't mean you're going to have a blasty blast. So I've come up with a Broke Girls Guide to help you have a great night out with your gal pals when your funds are low.

Your Attitude
You must keep a positive attitude when getting ready and driving out to your destination that you're going to have a great night. Time for Lady Balls!! Get dolled up and wear your favorite outfit and listen to cheesy ass music to get you pumped up and if you can, pregame it up! A couple drinks before you go out will always get you and the girls to loosen up a little.

Your Gang
Don't take out that friend of yours who is a complete bitch to guys just because she doesn't see herself ever banging him. We all know the only reason 99.9% of men are in the club is because they are looking for some strange. Make sure your girls took their Act-Right and are willing to talk to any guy who wants to buy your gang a round. Just because you talk to him for a minute or two, doesn't mean you need to go home with him or even give him your number at that (even though that's what he's thinking- I'm most certainly not trying to have your babies tonight creepy dude, you can go away now). But I'm definitely not going to descriminate any guy who wants to buy me a drink or two when my broke ass doesn't have money to! Plus I'm sure if he's a super creep, security won't mind helping taking care of him... they have nothing else to do and maybe you can make a new insider friend for your next night out ;)

Your Motive
Please remember your motive of going out when you're broke: To flirt and get free drinks so you and your gals could have a fabulous night 'cause you're all smokin' hot. NOT so you could have a drunken meltdown at the end of the night because you didn't find Prince Charming and you're still single. Be goofy, dance till your feet hurt, talk to guys who you normally wouldn't talk to and most importantly: don't forget the camera!

To all the men this has offended, I apologize... The truth hurts.
It's good to have a vagina.

Call Me Old Fashioned...

but I prefer a phone call over a text. Texting is so impersonal. When you just need to get across a simple message like "Meet me at 5 at blah blah" then yeah, it's ok. What I don't like is when guys start talking to a girl and they try to have a full blown conversation via text asking question after question. Why don't you stop being so damn lazy and call me?!? Does the sound of my voice really make your ears bleed? Well if so, leave me alone then! And then some guys get so comfortable with texting, that it's all they want to do. I'm not in 4th grade, I don't need a fucking pen pal.
Texting a cute little message during the day is acceptable and I understand not everyone is lucky enough to sit at their computer all day doing absolutely nothing productive....... But after work when you're at home sitting on your couch watching garbage tv and texting a girl question after question waiting for her to respond and you immediately write back when she does, why wouldn't you just pick up the phone and call her? Also, the tone of a person's text. That is the worst when two people cannot understand each other's tones and one person gets slightly offended or worse, creeped out if the other person is joking. But that is a whole notha pickle for a different day!

I recently came across a blog written by a man on HowAboutWe that says texting is better than a call... Lazy. Ass. Bullshit. Here are the reasons they came up with and underneath are my reasons for calling bullshit.

7 Reasons Texts Are Better Than Phone Calls 

1) Because you can actually think about what you're going to say.
Hand me a telephone, and I will say something stupid into it. Hand me a telephone with someone I like on the other end, and I will say something really stupid. With a text, you can plan, and yes, even revise.
BS: Gay. Girls like a quick, witty and ORIGINAL man. Now I understand not all men are quick and witty but having to sit there and think about what you're going to say and erasing what you first had isn't very original. When you're on the phone, what you really would think and say comes out just naturally vs. having a few minutes to try and be witty. After all, you want this girl to like the REAL YOU; not the guy who has to over analyze everything he says because he's scared she won't like him after. If you say something stupid, I'm sure she will be able to just giggle it off and carry on with the convo.

2) Because phone calls can be painfully awkward.
Even if you have perfect elocution, a great speaking voice, and fantastic oratorical skills, factors such as poor cell-phone reception or other interruptions (another call, an ambulance driving by, a barking dog) can lead to uncomfortable interruptions. There's nothing worse than speaking to someone on the phone for the first time and having to continually say "Wait--what? Sorry, can you hear me? Wait, hold on, walking by construction site..." over and over.
BS: Take off your kid Spiderman chonies and put on your grown man Calvin Klein briefs. Everything is awkward at first, just be confident and know she's not going to dump you after your first phone convo and if she does, then eff her! Call when you know it will be a good time to talk and if you REALLY cannot wait to speak to her then text her and say something like hey "Is it cool if I call you when I get (insert place) cause I can't hear a thing but I definitely want to hear your voice". You could even throw in a smiley or winkey face and I can guarantee a smile will stretch across her face cause it says "I'm interested and I want to talk to you and I want to make sure you have time to talk to me"... Plus, bitches love smiley faces.

3) Because a good text message will say a lot about a person.
A perfect text message requires wit, brevity, and flirtation. A good texter is smart, sharp, and good with words. Additionally, someone who uses unnecessary text abbreviations, or, god help him, emoticons is immediately ruled out as a potential love interest.
BS: Ok the above is true; but you could also be making her wait a couple hours for that "perfect" thing to say to her when it finally comes to you and if you keep using quirky and witty replies, she will probably think you're a pro at it and assume you are a player. A few sharp and flirty replies are cute, just not all the time. Also for the emoticons, see #2 about smiley faces.

4) Because texting can be great foreplay.
It's a prolonged flirtation that can span the course of the week or day leading up to a date.
No BS on this one. Next!

5) Because there is nothing sexy about a perfunctory "let's set up a date" call.
Sure, a phone call is "to the point", and on a purely utilitarian level more efficient than texting when it comes to making plans. But are you really looking for "efficiency" in your dating life? You call to quickly make an appointment with your dentist, not with your date.
BS: Really? I wasn't aware that any text implying "Want to have dinner Saturday at 8?" could be sexy. Plus, who cares if that text is sexy?? It's what you say to her when you're with her that needs to be charming. Why is this guy always trying to be sexy? Someone listened to wayyy too much JT that morning.

6) Because a text lets you write what you're too shy to say.
Sometimes, especially during the early stages of dating, it can be hard to straight out say the things you're feeling, especially if you're unsure of how it will be reciprocated. A "You looked beautiful last night" or "I had an amazing time with you" the next morning is a safe (and always appreciated!) way of doing this.
Ok, there's really no BS on this one... the whole "I had an amazing time with you" text is cute. Just don't be afraid to say these things to her after your first couple of rendezvous because girls love to hear these comments, not just read them.


7) Because a text is forever.
I usually don't swoon at phone calls, but if I get an excellently crafted text, I will save that thing forever, and pull it up and read it again and again.
BS: Until the next drunken night out and the phone gets dropped in a toilet, then it's all down the drain ;)