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"We loved, thank you. You've enriched my life. Now go, prosper."
But I'm much more:
"We didn't work out. You need to not exist."
Showing posts with label Single Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Single Life. Show all posts
Friday, August 24, 2012
Friday, April 27, 2012
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Wass Up My Ni Gah
I love this guy TimothyDeLaGhetto, subscribe to him on YouTube! Or don't! I don't give a fraggle rock!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
ManEating Chronicles: Crazy Boy
Crazy Boyyyyyyy dontcha know that I'm scared of youuuuuu..
me: GOD! CB is going to let me eat him alive
Daria: ?
me: He's making it so obvious that he really wants to date to me, possibly put a ring on it and I'm like ehhh I guess I can use you for now lol
Daria: Ewww doesn't he have kids??
me: Check your mail, I forwarded our chats from today & yesterday. And yes, KIDS. As in more than one =/
Daria: He's a douche and he's not funny, I know you weren't really "lmao"
me: lol I was a lil bit... Yesterday I was laughing more, but today I'm just laughing AT him like NIGGA PLEASE!Daria: GINA!!! He said YAY and put a <3, Please dismiss him immediately
me: HA! I'm just talking to him as a friend, he'll understand that sooner or later
Daria: Is he a girl?
'Cause this thing: ?!?!?Has GOTS to gome: I know! It's like calm down nig!
Daria: My brain was spinning reading that convo... All those typos
me: Calm yourself IagoooooDaria: I'm gonna jump on your facebook and be like HEY Gina!!!! What are you doing?!?!?!?!?! Get on the gangster so we can chat!!!!!!!!! Okay?!?!?!?!? <3What a loooooooser
Remember Crazy Boy?
me: Member when CB was trying to get at me & everything he said was !?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?
Daria: LMFAOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
So what are you doing Gina?!?!?!?!?!
me: LMFAOOOO!?!?!??!!?!?!Daria: omg that was the funniest shit ever!!! we were like why is he yelling? why's he so mad?
me: That's why I always laughed whenever he said something. It wasn't even funny but the fact that he had to make it SERIOUS was like dag, calm down!
Daria gets a dose of Crazy
Daria: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNINGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!! it's HUMP DAY!!!!!!! did you get your weekly HUMP???
NO??!?!?!?!?!
neither did I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
me: ?!?!?!?!?!?
Daria: asap
how was your night tell me everything
me: ? I didn't do anything. You tell me about YOUR night
Daria: wellllllllllllllllllllllllllll
me: can you please take a fucking xanax or something to calm the fuck down?
Daria: LMFAO FAAAAAAAAAAAACK YOU!!!!!!!!! don't hate on my energy
HATER
me: Now you know what CB feels like everyday!?!?!??!?!
Daria: YES ACTUALLY I DO?!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!me: LMAO ok tell me about your night and try to keep each word limited to only 3 repeated letters
Ok, it's confirmed... Daria is a Crazy Girl
Daria: omgomgomg
ARE WE GOING TO JIMBOS THIS WEEKEND?!?!me: CB????
Is that you
Daria: lmfaooooooooooooooooooo
me: ???
Daria: you bitch
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
instagram marriage
My sister is such a silly goose. Last weekend we were hanging out at her house sitting in the living room not speaking to each other, totally dazed into our iPhones and having a grand time.
I was browsing through my Instagram when I squealed to her "OMG I totally have an Instagram boyfriend! He likes to converse with me on his pics & he's super hot!" to which she replied "What? Who?"
I then showed her his pictures and seeing how good looking he was she said "He's not real, and look, he is following nothing but girls". Then I told her "Geez, hater! I'm not seriously trying to date this guy, that's why I said Instagram boyfriend.... Plus he lives in California, and I already stalked him on Facebook, so he is in fact REAL."
I don't know how she doesn't already know that I use the term "boyfriend" loosely when talking about men on the internet.... and Mark Wahlberg.
ps. Follow me for the shittiest pictures you've ever laid eyes on
Friday, January 20, 2012
Random Conversation
Friend (who shall remain anonymous for their dignity's sake): I almost, almooooosst, left *enter lovers name* this weekend to go spend the night with *enter luster's name*.
Is that horrible?
Me: That's WHORrible
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Now THIS is great reality TV
Blind Date!!
I was scrolling through The Frisky when I was reminded how much I enjoyed this show when it was aired regularly. Bring it back CW!! Wasn't CW formerly UPN?
Anways, for all of you tweens who have no idea what TV was like in the 90's, the title of the show pretty much sums it up. Two strangers are arranged to go on a blind date (get it?!) and spend what seems like an entire day together (unless one of them really can't stand the other & dips early) doing activities, talking & learning about each other (sometimes) that leads to many awkward moments. They are then given lots of alcohol which REALLY brings out their true personalities and at the end of the date they either exchange phone numbers or emails (not webpages) or go home with each other. The best part is the little pop up bubbles with comments.
Anyways, this episode is great. You must watch it... or I want my friendship bracelet back.
First clue that this is a 90's show: his COUCH. Check out that baby. I think we all knew someone with a couch like that back in the days, wood grain on straight uncomfortable fluffy heaven.
My favorite awkward moment is how he gets really quiet when she asks him why he doesn't drive. Then she asks him about how many interesting" car accidents he's been in... WTH, who says that while driving someone around? I'm surprised he didn't ask her to pull over. Wait, why did the producers of the show even give her a set of keys???
It's probably pretty obvious by their first outing that he is going no where with her. If this guy is way too weird for even THIS woman, he's got to be a serial killer by now.
I was scrolling through The Frisky when I was reminded how much I enjoyed this show when it was aired regularly. Bring it back CW!! Wasn't CW formerly UPN?
Anways, for all of you tweens who have no idea what TV was like in the 90's, the title of the show pretty much sums it up. Two strangers are arranged to go on a blind date (get it?!) and spend what seems like an entire day together (unless one of them really can't stand the other & dips early) doing activities, talking & learning about each other (sometimes) that leads to many awkward moments. They are then given lots of alcohol which REALLY brings out their true personalities and at the end of the date they either exchange phone numbers or emails (not webpages) or go home with each other. The best part is the little pop up bubbles with comments.
Anyways, this episode is great. You must watch it... or I want my friendship bracelet back.
First clue that this is a 90's show: his COUCH. Check out that baby. I think we all knew someone with a couch like that back in the days, wood grain on straight uncomfortable fluffy heaven.
My favorite awkward moment is how he gets really quiet when she asks him why he doesn't drive. Then she asks him about how many interesting" car accidents he's been in... WTH, who says that while driving someone around? I'm surprised he didn't ask her to pull over. Wait, why did the producers of the show even give her a set of keys???
It's probably pretty obvious by their first outing that he is going no where with her. If this guy is way too weird for even THIS woman, he's got to be a serial killer by now.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Deal or No Deal?
I came across this Glamour article today about the hanging testicles men like to put on the back of their trucks and all I have to say is: Why, men? Just... Why? Anyways, the article also mentions a "No Fat Chicks" sticker, which I would be completely fine with if there was a "No Small Dicks" sticker for women's cars. But even if there was one, we wouldn't use it. Maybe stick it to the front of our bedroom doors, but we most certainly wouldn't have the audacity to place one on our cars. Why? Because we are women and we have class and we'd like to date someone, someday.
This started making me think about my deal breakers for guys who I wouldn't date, and I know what you're all thinking... YES I have standards! Ugh... Read on for some I could think of.
If he buys you a Toyota Corolla with a big red bow on it. I mean...
This started making me think about my deal breakers for guys who I wouldn't date, and I know what you're all thinking... YES I have standards! Ugh... Read on for some I could think of.
- The man cruising down the streets, windows down while it's 100+ degrees out, stereo blasting, wearing the "I Love Haters" hat. Ok, really any man who wears anything that says that. Even a key chain with this will disqualify him.
- The man who constantly talks about himself and all of his accomplishments or life struggles he's overcome. Get a diary or a dog.
- The man who is at the strip club every.single.week. Perverted much!
- The man who is a Negative Ned and extremely bitter towards all women. Sounds like someone's just been dumped!
- The man who likes to brag about all the money he spends "at da club, poppin' bottles of henny". Way to be humble and attract gold diggers.
- The man who is a jerk to his own friends... a relationship between the two of you isn't looking very promising.
- Mama's boys who are proud of being Mama's boys.
- The man who still lives with his ex girlfriend.
- The man driving around with either the No Fat Chicks sticker or the No Small Dicks sticker.
If he buys you a Toyota Corolla with a big red bow on it. I mean...
WHO buys someone a TOYOTA COROLLA!?
ESPECIALLY with a big red bow on it like it's a Mercedes Benz or something?
Now THAT, is an acceptable gift that says 'I would like to date you'.
(Yes, my friend is a spoiled little Arabic Princess in case you were wondering.)
I'm sure there are some more deal breakers I just can't think of right now, so if you have any good ones, feel free to share :)
Random thought
I've always heard women say that their feet grew after each kid...
I don't think I ever want kids now, I have too many cute shoes I've invested in this year!!
I don't think I ever want kids now, I have too many cute shoes I've invested in this year!!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
We're in our TWENTIES!
Recently my best friend's favorite saying is "but we're in our twenties", like if we're supposed to have it all figured out by the time we're 25 and not be making stupid decisions, especially about men. I told her we should probably cherish it while we can before we hit our 30's and her response was : "WHAT, you're crazy. We're gonna be freaking fabulous in our 30's, hubby's and kids and we're still gonna look fly".... So that means now is the time to make all of our mistakes and be stupid cause we're going to be boring and miserable with offspring clinging to our legs at every.second.of.every.day.
Well at least that's what she thinks, I'm not making myself any promises for my 30's with the whole Hubby & Kids package.
Away from Fantasy Island and in my opinion, my twenties seem to be nothing but a "Trial and Error" life stage. We're legal adults with child thoughts and actions. And we're learning that our actions and decisions have life lasting consequences and only we are responsible for them. We're learning that being that independent adult we've always wanted to be, isn't 100% awesome as we thought. Sure we can stay up as late as we want and drink as much alcohol as we want, but we have to get up for WORK the next morning because we are now paying for our own shit like cars and homes if we'd prefer not to be homeless. The paycheck you get from your awesome job is only glorified for a few days, till more than half of it goes to bills. Then you gotta learn how to stretch out the little of that check that is left, for two WHOLE weeks and manage to go out and do something fun but not too pricey. Oh yeah, that credit card you got approved for when you were big & bad and 18, should probably be paid on time and more than the minimum payment if you ever want credit to get a place of your own or a nicer car than the hooptie your parents bought you when you were 16 that is now 12 years old.
Recently, another friend and I were chatting about how being responsible sucks and makes us poor, so I told her "We're gonna look back at us one day and laugh at how poor we were... Hopefully that day is Friday aka PAYDAY!" Which seems like it's every other week I feel that way. I've learned moving in with friends isn't always the best idea like everyone says... especially when your roommate doesn't pay their rent which then results to shit credit. I'm learning that sometimes super cute shoes are more important than a week's worth of lunch food, especially when you're trying to diet (do the math people). I've learned that we cannot eat all the junk food we once did, now we have to count every single calorie. I've learned that guys can gossip just as much as girls and it takes most of them longer to mature than women. I've learned that there's just some guys that you should stay far away from, but you won't because Danger is your middle name. And I've learned that being in our twenties, we're old enough to know better, yet we're young enough not to care.
Hey, we're in our twenties, it's all good! At least we'll have memories to entertain our thirty year old brains with.
Well at least that's what she thinks, I'm not making myself any promises for my 30's with the whole Hubby & Kids package.
Away from Fantasy Island and in my opinion, my twenties seem to be nothing but a "Trial and Error" life stage. We're legal adults with child thoughts and actions. And we're learning that our actions and decisions have life lasting consequences and only we are responsible for them. We're learning that being that independent adult we've always wanted to be, isn't 100% awesome as we thought. Sure we can stay up as late as we want and drink as much alcohol as we want, but we have to get up for WORK the next morning because we are now paying for our own shit like cars and homes if we'd prefer not to be homeless. The paycheck you get from your awesome job is only glorified for a few days, till more than half of it goes to bills. Then you gotta learn how to stretch out the little of that check that is left, for two WHOLE weeks and manage to go out and do something fun but not too pricey. Oh yeah, that credit card you got approved for when you were big & bad and 18, should probably be paid on time and more than the minimum payment if you ever want credit to get a place of your own or a nicer car than the hooptie your parents bought you when you were 16 that is now 12 years old.
Recently, another friend and I were chatting about how being responsible sucks and makes us poor, so I told her "We're gonna look back at us one day and laugh at how poor we were... Hopefully that day is Friday aka PAYDAY!" Which seems like it's every other week I feel that way. I've learned moving in with friends isn't always the best idea like everyone says... especially when your roommate doesn't pay their rent which then results to shit credit. I'm learning that sometimes super cute shoes are more important than a week's worth of lunch food, especially when you're trying to diet (do the math people). I've learned that we cannot eat all the junk food we once did, now we have to count every single calorie. I've learned that guys can gossip just as much as girls and it takes most of them longer to mature than women. I've learned that there's just some guys that you should stay far away from, but you won't because Danger is your middle name. And I've learned that being in our twenties, we're old enough to know better, yet we're young enough not to care.
Hey, we're in our twenties, it's all good! At least we'll have memories to entertain our thirty year old brains with.
Good judgment comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgment.
- Jim Horning
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Tia Gina
Day 3 of no Facebook: not too bad, I've only wanted to navigate there twice today. Yesterday was ridic, I almost quit on quitting!
Now back to my post.
Today I came across this super cute article about the founder of SavvyAunt.com who is a married woman and has decided her life is complete without children because she has enough nieces and nephews to fill that void of children. I was instantly intrigued in what this woman has to say because I don't have any children and I'm not interested in any at the moment because I also have plenty of nieces and nephews to borrow then return when I'm ready to go back to "me time". Although I can relate a lot about what the founder is going through not having or wanting children because she is an Aunt, I have to say that right now I'm not ready for kids but I'm not sure about not having children at all. I would love to have my own asshole children someday when I'm ready for it... Or at least married, because being single and not even dating anyone special at the moment doesn't seem like having a child would make my life anymore special.
I love it when people come to one of my family gatherings and are in complete shock of all the children running around then they turn to me and say "When are you going to have kids?". I swear my Sister has a 6th sense for when I get asked this question because without a second to waste she instantly yells "Never! She can take one of mine". My initial thought to this question is 'Does this family really need more children running around?' then 'I'm not even married you jackoff!' then 'Well I'm half way to 50 and it's clear that no one even wants to marry me, where's the fucking ice cream!?' and then I'm the one full of rage breaking the piñata. Ok that last part I made up, but you get the gist.
For the time being, my heart is complete with all of the blessings I call nieces & nephews. I love how they get excited to see me every time I come around -probably because they always tell me that I'm like a big kid 'cause I'm always willing to do goofy things with them. I also love it that they confide in me for things they aren't so sure in telling their parents about 'cause they don't want to get whooped and they know I'm going to let it slide. The best part of it all is that I can enjoy the company of children as long as I want then when I'm over it, I go back to my "world" of selfishness and negligence. I'm sure when it's my time to have children or if I ever do, I will be fine... as long as I can learn to not to refer to them as assholes. I've had oodles and oodles of experience with kids and I learned CPR off YouTube so we should be golden ;)
Now back to my post.
Today I came across this super cute article about the founder of SavvyAunt.com who is a married woman and has decided her life is complete without children because she has enough nieces and nephews to fill that void of children. I was instantly intrigued in what this woman has to say because I don't have any children and I'm not interested in any at the moment because I also have plenty of nieces and nephews to borrow then return when I'm ready to go back to "me time". Although I can relate a lot about what the founder is going through not having or wanting children because she is an Aunt, I have to say that right now I'm not ready for kids but I'm not sure about not having children at all. I would love to have my own asshole children someday when I'm ready for it... Or at least married, because being single and not even dating anyone special at the moment doesn't seem like having a child would make my life anymore special.
I love it when people come to one of my family gatherings and are in complete shock of all the children running around then they turn to me and say "When are you going to have kids?". I swear my Sister has a 6th sense for when I get asked this question because without a second to waste she instantly yells "Never! She can take one of mine". My initial thought to this question is 'Does this family really need more children running around?' then 'I'm not even married you jackoff!' then 'Well I'm half way to 50 and it's clear that no one even wants to marry me, where's the fucking ice cream!?' and then I'm the one full of rage breaking the piñata. Ok that last part I made up, but you get the gist.
For the time being, my heart is complete with all of the blessings I call nieces & nephews. I love how they get excited to see me every time I come around -probably because they always tell me that I'm like a big kid 'cause I'm always willing to do goofy things with them. I also love it that they confide in me for things they aren't so sure in telling their parents about 'cause they don't want to get whooped and they know I'm going to let it slide. The best part of it all is that I can enjoy the company of children as long as I want then when I'm over it, I go back to my "world" of selfishness and negligence. I'm sure when it's my time to have children or if I ever do, I will be fine... as long as I can learn to not to refer to them as assholes. I've had oodles and oodles of experience with kids and I learned CPR off YouTube so we should be golden ;)
"Here's the truth about aunthood. Unlike parents, aunts have no legal obligations. Aunthood is a gift. It's a gift to the children who never suffer from too much love. It's a gift to today's overburdened parents who can always use more hands and hearts when it comes to their kids. And it's a gift to us because it is one of the wonderful things that fills our lives with joy, love and purpose." -Melanie Notkin
Monday, September 26, 2011
Broke Girls Guide
Last week was National Singles Week and to honor this, my best single cousin, my friend who should be single and myself went out Friday night and let the West side of Phoenix know we love being single! None of us had money to spend on getting ourselves drunk, so we decided we'd make it a point to have all the guys buy our drinks as an exchange for our company... for 2 minutes of course. The night was a complete success and we got our free drinks all night and left the club with Australian accents. I forgot how fun it is to go out and just to be slightly obnoxious.
After recovering the next day, I realized you've got to have a plan to have a good night like these 'cause we all know every single night you go out doesn't mean you're going to have a blasty blast. So I've come up with a Broke Girls Guide to help you have a great night out with your gal pals when your funds are low.
Your Attitude
You must keep a positive attitude when getting ready and driving out to your destination that you're going to have a great night. Time for Lady Balls!! Get dolled up and wear your favorite outfit and listen to cheesy ass music to get you pumped up and if you can, pregame it up! A couple drinks before you go out will always get you and the girls to loosen up a little.
Your Gang
Don't take out that friend of yours who is a complete bitch to guys just because she doesn't see herself ever banging him. We all know the only reason 99.9% of men are in the club is because they are looking for some strange. Make sure your girls took their Act-Right and are willing to talk to any guy who wants to buy your gang a round. Just because you talk to him for a minute or two, doesn't mean you need to go home with him or even give him your number at that (even though that's what he's thinking- I'm most certainly not trying to have your babies tonight creepy dude, you can go away now). But I'm definitely not going to descriminate any guy who wants to buy me a drink or two when my broke ass doesn't have money to! Plus I'm sure if he's a super creep, security won't mind helping taking care of him... they have nothing else to do and maybe you can make a new insider friend for your next night out ;)
Your Motive
Please remember your motive of going out when you're broke: To flirt and get free drinks so you and your gals could have a fabulous night 'cause you're all smokin' hot. NOT so you could have a drunken meltdown at the end of the night because you didn't find Prince Charming and you're still single. Be goofy, dance till your feet hurt, talk to guys who you normally wouldn't talk to and most importantly: don't forget the camera!
To all the men this has offended, I apologize... The truth hurts.
It's good to have a vagina.
After recovering the next day, I realized you've got to have a plan to have a good night like these 'cause we all know every single night you go out doesn't mean you're going to have a blasty blast. So I've come up with a Broke Girls Guide to help you have a great night out with your gal pals when your funds are low.
Your Attitude
You must keep a positive attitude when getting ready and driving out to your destination that you're going to have a great night. Time for Lady Balls!! Get dolled up and wear your favorite outfit and listen to cheesy ass music to get you pumped up and if you can, pregame it up! A couple drinks before you go out will always get you and the girls to loosen up a little.
Your Gang
Don't take out that friend of yours who is a complete bitch to guys just because she doesn't see herself ever banging him. We all know the only reason 99.9% of men are in the club is because they are looking for some strange. Make sure your girls took their Act-Right and are willing to talk to any guy who wants to buy your gang a round. Just because you talk to him for a minute or two, doesn't mean you need to go home with him or even give him your number at that (even though that's what he's thinking- I'm most certainly not trying to have your babies tonight creepy dude, you can go away now). But I'm definitely not going to descriminate any guy who wants to buy me a drink or two when my broke ass doesn't have money to! Plus I'm sure if he's a super creep, security won't mind helping taking care of him... they have nothing else to do and maybe you can make a new insider friend for your next night out ;)
Your Motive
Please remember your motive of going out when you're broke: To flirt and get free drinks so you and your gals could have a fabulous night 'cause you're all smokin' hot. NOT so you could have a drunken meltdown at the end of the night because you didn't find Prince Charming and you're still single. Be goofy, dance till your feet hurt, talk to guys who you normally wouldn't talk to and most importantly: don't forget the camera!
To all the men this has offended, I apologize... The truth hurts.
It's good to have a vagina.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Literally... No, seriously
I don't know how many times this has happened... and why it still does:
The Text
Him: "What's up"
The Analysis
K: I don’t think it’s that much of an exaggeration to say that people who only text “what’s up” all the time should be banished to an island that is slowly sinking.
B: He sends this text to me every couple of weeks, on Friday nights.
K: Once a fortnight?!?
B: Yes. Once a fortnight.
K: He’s basically providing you with opportunities to reply "not much, wanna do it?"
B: I mean, yeah, he's just politely reminding me that he and his penis are still in the world.
K: Aren't he and his penis still dating a 19-year-old?
B: Yes, but he and his penis are nothing if not inclusive.
K: You should just start replying with literally everything you did that day.
B: Yes! Like, "Hey, not much! I had some crazy-good cereal this morning and walked my dog. She...shit...everywhere. Lol, gross. So I took her to the vet and the vet was like 'omg cute dog' and I was like 'omg I know right' and she was like 'haha but really your dog needs some heartworm medicine' and I was like 'fiiiiiine.' Then basically I was just at work all day! At lunch I painted my nails this really great coral pink color. Or really it's like, nectarine-y. It's hard to describe via text, want a pic?!?"
Read more on how girls over analyze text messages here , this woman is hilarious.
p.s. If I was smart I could just say I was hanging out with my boyfriend... even if he's imaginary, whatever will make these guys stop.
The Text
Him: "What's up"
The Analysis
K: I don’t think it’s that much of an exaggeration to say that people who only text “what’s up” all the time should be banished to an island that is slowly sinking.
B: He sends this text to me every couple of weeks, on Friday nights.
K: Once a fortnight?!?
B: Yes. Once a fortnight.
K: He’s basically providing you with opportunities to reply "not much, wanna do it?"
B: I mean, yeah, he's just politely reminding me that he and his penis are still in the world.
K: Aren't he and his penis still dating a 19-year-old?
B: Yes, but he and his penis are nothing if not inclusive.
K: You should just start replying with literally everything you did that day.
B: Yes! Like, "Hey, not much! I had some crazy-good cereal this morning and walked my dog. She...shit...everywhere. Lol, gross. So I took her to the vet and the vet was like 'omg cute dog' and I was like 'omg I know right' and she was like 'haha but really your dog needs some heartworm medicine' and I was like 'fiiiiiine.' Then basically I was just at work all day! At lunch I painted my nails this really great coral pink color. Or really it's like, nectarine-y. It's hard to describe via text, want a pic?!?"
Read more on how girls over analyze text messages here , this woman is hilarious.
p.s. If I was smart I could just say I was hanging out with my boyfriend... even if he's imaginary, whatever will make these guys stop.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Call Me Old Fashioned...
but I prefer a phone call over a text. Texting is so impersonal. When you just need to get across a simple message like "Meet me at 5 at blah blah" then yeah, it's ok. What I don't like is when guys start talking to a girl and they try to have a full blown conversation via text asking question after question. Why don't you stop being so damn lazy and call me?!? Does the sound of my voice really make your ears bleed? Well if so, leave me alone then! And then some guys get so comfortable with texting, that it's all they want to do. I'm not in 4th grade, I don't need a fucking pen pal.
Texting a cute little message during the day is acceptable and I understand not everyone is lucky enough to sit at their computer all day doing absolutely nothing productive....... But after work when you're at home sitting on your couch watching garbage tv and texting a girl question after question waiting for her to respond and you immediately write back when she does, why wouldn't you just pick up the phone and call her? Also, the tone of a person's text. That is the worst when two people cannot understand each other's tones and one person gets slightly offended or worse, creeped out if the other person is joking. But that is a whole notha pickle for a different day!
I recently came across a blog written by a man on HowAboutWe that says texting is better than a call... Lazy. Ass. Bullshit. Here are the reasons they came up with and underneath are my reasons for calling bullshit.
7 Reasons Texts Are Better Than Phone Calls
1) Because you can actually think about what you're going to say.
Hand me a telephone, and I will say something stupid into it. Hand me a telephone with someone I like on the other end, and I will say something really stupid. With a text, you can plan, and yes, even revise.
BS: Gay. Girls like a quick, witty and ORIGINAL man. Now I understand not all men are quick and witty but having to sit there and think about what you're going to say and erasing what you first had isn't very original. When you're on the phone, what you really would think and say comes out just naturally vs. having a few minutes to try and be witty. After all, you want this girl to like the REAL YOU; not the guy who has to over analyze everything he says because he's scared she won't like him after. If you say something stupid, I'm sure she will be able to just giggle it off and carry on with the convo.
2) Because phone calls can be painfully awkward.
Even if you have perfect elocution, a great speaking voice, and fantastic oratorical skills, factors such as poor cell-phone reception or other interruptions (another call, an ambulance driving by, a barking dog) can lead to uncomfortable interruptions. There's nothing worse than speaking to someone on the phone for the first time and having to continually say "Wait--what? Sorry, can you hear me? Wait, hold on, walking by construction site..." over and over.
BS: Take off your kid Spiderman chonies and put on your grown man Calvin Klein briefs. Everything is awkward at first, just be confident and know she's not going to dump you after your first phone convo and if she does, then eff her! Call when you know it will be a good time to talk and if you REALLY cannot wait to speak to her then text her and say something like hey "Is it cool if I call you when I get (insert place) cause I can't hear a thing but I definitely want to hear your voice". You could even throw in a smiley or winkey face and I can guarantee a smile will stretch across her face cause it says "I'm interested and I want to talk to you and I want to make sure you have time to talk to me"... Plus, bitches love smiley faces.
3) Because a good text message will say a lot about a person.
A perfect text message requires wit, brevity, and flirtation. A good texter is smart, sharp, and good with words. Additionally, someone who uses unnecessary text abbreviations, or, god help him, emoticons is immediately ruled out as a potential love interest.
BS: Ok the above is true; but you could also be making her wait a couple hours for that "perfect" thing to say to her when it finally comes to you and if you keep using quirky and witty replies, she will probably think you're a pro at it and assume you are a player. A few sharp and flirty replies are cute, just not all the time. Also for the emoticons, see #2 about smiley faces.
4) Because texting can be great foreplay.
It's a prolonged flirtation that can span the course of the week or day leading up to a date.
No BS on this one. Next!
5) Because there is nothing sexy about a perfunctory "let's set up a date" call.
Sure, a phone call is "to the point", and on a purely utilitarian level more efficient than texting when it comes to making plans. But are you really looking for "efficiency" in your dating life? You call to quickly make an appointment with your dentist, not with your date.
BS: Really? I wasn't aware that any text implying "Want to have dinner Saturday at 8?" could be sexy. Plus, who cares if that text is sexy?? It's what you say to her when you're with her that needs to be charming. Why is this guy always trying to be sexy? Someone listened to wayyy too much JT that morning.
6) Because a text lets you write what you're too shy to say.
Sometimes, especially during the early stages of dating, it can be hard to straight out say the things you're feeling, especially if you're unsure of how it will be reciprocated. A "You looked beautiful last night" or "I had an amazing time with you" the next morning is a safe (and always appreciated!) way of doing this.
Ok, there's really no BS on this one... the whole "I had an amazing time with you" text is cute. Just don't be afraid to say these things to her after your first couple of rendezvous because girls love to hear these comments, not just read them.
7) Because a text is forever.
I usually don't swoon at phone calls, but if I get an excellently crafted text, I will save that thing forever, and pull it up and read it again and again.
BS: Until the next drunken night out and the phone gets dropped in a toilet, then it's all down the drain ;)
Texting a cute little message during the day is acceptable and I understand not everyone is lucky enough to sit at their computer all day doing absolutely nothing productive....... But after work when you're at home sitting on your couch watching garbage tv and texting a girl question after question waiting for her to respond and you immediately write back when she does, why wouldn't you just pick up the phone and call her? Also, the tone of a person's text. That is the worst when two people cannot understand each other's tones and one person gets slightly offended or worse, creeped out if the other person is joking. But that is a whole notha pickle for a different day!
I recently came across a blog written by a man on HowAboutWe that says texting is better than a call... Lazy. Ass. Bullshit. Here are the reasons they came up with and underneath are my reasons for calling bullshit.
7 Reasons Texts Are Better Than Phone Calls
1) Because you can actually think about what you're going to say.
Hand me a telephone, and I will say something stupid into it. Hand me a telephone with someone I like on the other end, and I will say something really stupid. With a text, you can plan, and yes, even revise.
BS: Gay. Girls like a quick, witty and ORIGINAL man. Now I understand not all men are quick and witty but having to sit there and think about what you're going to say and erasing what you first had isn't very original. When you're on the phone, what you really would think and say comes out just naturally vs. having a few minutes to try and be witty. After all, you want this girl to like the REAL YOU; not the guy who has to over analyze everything he says because he's scared she won't like him after. If you say something stupid, I'm sure she will be able to just giggle it off and carry on with the convo.
2) Because phone calls can be painfully awkward.
Even if you have perfect elocution, a great speaking voice, and fantastic oratorical skills, factors such as poor cell-phone reception or other interruptions (another call, an ambulance driving by, a barking dog) can lead to uncomfortable interruptions. There's nothing worse than speaking to someone on the phone for the first time and having to continually say "Wait--what? Sorry, can you hear me? Wait, hold on, walking by construction site..." over and over.
BS: Take off your kid Spiderman chonies and put on your grown man Calvin Klein briefs. Everything is awkward at first, just be confident and know she's not going to dump you after your first phone convo and if she does, then eff her! Call when you know it will be a good time to talk and if you REALLY cannot wait to speak to her then text her and say something like hey "Is it cool if I call you when I get (insert place) cause I can't hear a thing but I definitely want to hear your voice". You could even throw in a smiley or winkey face and I can guarantee a smile will stretch across her face cause it says "I'm interested and I want to talk to you and I want to make sure you have time to talk to me"... Plus, bitches love smiley faces.
3) Because a good text message will say a lot about a person.
A perfect text message requires wit, brevity, and flirtation. A good texter is smart, sharp, and good with words. Additionally, someone who uses unnecessary text abbreviations, or, god help him, emoticons is immediately ruled out as a potential love interest.
BS: Ok the above is true; but you could also be making her wait a couple hours for that "perfect" thing to say to her when it finally comes to you and if you keep using quirky and witty replies, she will probably think you're a pro at it and assume you are a player. A few sharp and flirty replies are cute, just not all the time. Also for the emoticons, see #2 about smiley faces.
4) Because texting can be great foreplay.
It's a prolonged flirtation that can span the course of the week or day leading up to a date.
No BS on this one. Next!
5) Because there is nothing sexy about a perfunctory "let's set up a date" call.
Sure, a phone call is "to the point", and on a purely utilitarian level more efficient than texting when it comes to making plans. But are you really looking for "efficiency" in your dating life? You call to quickly make an appointment with your dentist, not with your date.
BS: Really? I wasn't aware that any text implying "Want to have dinner Saturday at 8?" could be sexy. Plus, who cares if that text is sexy?? It's what you say to her when you're with her that needs to be charming. Why is this guy always trying to be sexy? Someone listened to wayyy too much JT that morning.
6) Because a text lets you write what you're too shy to say.
Sometimes, especially during the early stages of dating, it can be hard to straight out say the things you're feeling, especially if you're unsure of how it will be reciprocated. A "You looked beautiful last night" or "I had an amazing time with you" the next morning is a safe (and always appreciated!) way of doing this.
Ok, there's really no BS on this one... the whole "I had an amazing time with you" text is cute. Just don't be afraid to say these things to her after your first couple of rendezvous because girls love to hear these comments, not just read them.
7) Because a text is forever.
I usually don't swoon at phone calls, but if I get an excellently crafted text, I will save that thing forever, and pull it up and read it again and again.
BS: Until the next drunken night out and the phone gets dropped in a toilet, then it's all down the drain ;)
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